Part 3: Grandma Becomes a Pilot

If you missed it- read part one here and part two here.

1977

Grandpa Jack was a pilot, and he taught Grandma how to land the plane in case of an emergency.

But Grandma took it further than that. Once she got behind the steering wheel, she wanted to fly!

Grandma studied and studied to earn her small plane pilot’s license at 47 years old, one of her life’s proudest accomplishments.

Grandma and Grandpa enjoyed flying together in small planes to bring birthday cakes to their daughters in college. Sending all four daughters to college was non-negotiable for Grandma, and all Grandpa ever said about it was, “Okay.” 

In the same year that Grandma got her pilot’s license, the first ten women graduated the US Air Force Pilot training program, marking a pivotal moment in the history of women in aviation.

1978

Grandma became a member of The Ninety Nines, a club created by Amelia Earhart for female pilots when she was 48 years old.

The first meeting of The Ninety Nines took place one year before Grandma was born in 1929 and their mission was “to assemble for mutual support, the advancement of aviation and to create a central office to keep files on women in aviation.”

Click here to hear the official song of The 99s.

Grandma told me that one of her favorite things to do when she flew was create scavenger hunts for other pilots to fly over Richmond and find the items she described. 

In an interview, my mom asked Grandma what the craziest thing that ever happened to her was, and she told her the story of flying with another woman in The 99s. For the story purpose, we’ll call her Sheryl.

“I was flying with Sheryl who could not navigate. I don’t know what it was, she just could not figure it out,” Grandma said.

“Sheryl’s husband was a private pilot and instructor. She said she would get me lessons if I taught her navigation. At the time, I was studying for my IFR rating,” Grandma said. An Instrument Flight Rules (IFR) rating is a pilot’s qualification to fly in a variety of weather conditions and altitudes.

So one day while Grandma was teaching Sheryl how to navigate, they went to land in Fredericksburg, VA, but the light would not come on to indicate that the wheels were locked in position.

Grandma said, “Sheryl started to panic. I told her to call the tower, ask them to do a flyby. So they did, and they told us our wheels were down but they didn’t know if they were locked. I suggested we fly back to Richmond and declare an emergency, since they have more emergency equipment.” 

They started to fly toward Richmond, but then Sheryl insisted on landing in Chesterfield instead. Grandma objected, since Chesterfield was smaller and didn’t have the emergency response that the Richmond airport did.

Sheryl said to Grandma, “Will you please shut up! If I die, I’m going to die at home in Chesterfield.” 

So Grandma decided to shut up and pray for the best.

Sheryl flew to Chesterfield and took her chances landing.

I like to imagine the two women sitting there as they approached the landing, stoically, without screaming. Smoking a cigarette perhaps.

All Grandma said was, “We landed safely.”

She chuckled and said, “It turned out that the light sensor was broken, not the wheels.”

1981

The first computers were so massive and they took up entire floors of buildings, but IBM invented the first personal computer when Grandma was 51 years old. Pricing started at $1,565 for a configuration with 16 KB RAM, Color Graphics Adapter, keyboard, and no disk drives. 

In the same year, Sandra Day O’Connor was sworn in as the first woman to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court.

1983

The first commercially available cell phone was released when Grandma was 53 years old. Today, this phone would cost around $10,000.

1984

My mom and Dad got married after eight years of dating in 1984. They met in sixth grade at twelve years old. My dad sat behind my mom in class and tugged on her pigtails. They were good friends throughout middle school, and started dating in high school.

(L to R) Grandma, Dad, Mom, Grandpa

On the wedding day, my Grandpa made a mess of everything when he went to pick up the groomsmen and my dad. He also had my mom’s wedding dress and all the flowers for the bridesmaids.

My mom was getting her hair and make up done at the Berkeley Plantation, an outdoor historic venue by the James River.

The Berkeley Plantation is known as “America’s first plantation,” beginning in 1619 when settlers observed the first Thanksgiving. Two Presidents were born on the property in Virginia’s first three story brick mansion.

365 years after the The Berkeley Plantation was established, my mom began to worry when her dad never showed up with her wedding dress, flowers, groomsmen, or soon to be husband. One usher sat all the guests, and my uncle and my mom’s flute teacher played every song they knew multiple times to buy some time.

My mom started crying, thinking she was getting left at the alter. Ten minutes before the wedding was supposed to start, my mom looked out the window and saw a camper come speeding into the parking lot. My dad jumped out, running with all the groomsmen.

“I have never seen my mom so mad in my whole life,” Mom told me. Grandma was yelling at Grandpa: “Where have you been! You’re ruining the whole damn wedding!”

Grandpa shrugged and said something like, “Oh we got stuck in traffic from the state fair.”

Grandma yelled back, “You didn’t leave with enough time to begin with!”

Meanwhile, my dad says, “Tell Gail (my mom) don’t worry, we’ll start as soon as we can.”

Mom cried off all her make up thinking she was getting stood up, so she re-applied and got her wedding dress on.

My mom told me, “By the time the wedding started, I didn’t care what happened. I had the best time. I was like, What else is going to happen? It doesn’t matter.

Years later my mom found out that Father (my Dad’s dad) offered him cash to leave Mom at the alter. He told my dad, “There’s still time to run. I’ll give you $10,000.”

He was always an asshole (and still is today). I like to imagine my dad giving him the middle finger as soon as everyone stood and turned to watch my mom walk down the aisle with her dad escorting her.

My parents got engaged in May and married in September. Grandma was not pleased with the quick turn around.

“She could not believe it, but she planned a wedding in four months. I picked out my bridesmaid dresses, and she hated that I chose the color navy blue,” Mom told me.

Grandma said, “Navy blue looks like funeral, not a wedding.”

“And who’s getting married?” my mom snapped back.

“And who’s paying for it?” Grandma retorted.

“The bridesmaids!” my mom said. “I’m saving you money! I’m wearing the same dress as Cheri and Cathy and I’m paying to alter it.”

Grandma said fine, then she hand sewed pink dresses for the flower girls so she could have a color she liked in the wedding. Which is all very ironic to see Grandma wearing a light blue dress to the wedding, only a few shades different from the bridesmaids.

1987

Disposable contact lenses hit the consumer market when Grandma was 57, but she mostly stuck to wearing her glasses.

The last section of the Blue Ridge Parkway, the Linn Cove Viaduct, was completed, connecting the Blue Ridge Parkway all the way from Shenandoah in Virginia to Great Smoky Mountains National Park in North Carolina.

The Blue Ridge Parkway was started when Grandma was five years old, a project that lasted 52 years.

27 years after it’s completed, I went to college in the North Carolina mountains. I drove The Blue Ridge Parkway across the Linn Cove Viaduct every week, thinking nothing of it’s new nature. Mistakenly thinking I was striking out on my own! Going places my family never went!

Of course I knew The Famous Bear Story, but didn’t know it took place on Mount Pisgah, where I would take my first ever backpacking trip.

I did not know my family’s extensive camping history and I did not grow up camping like my mom and aunts did.

“Why didn’t you take us camping?” I asked my mom.

She laughed and said, “I had enough camping. We went every single weekend. No electricity, no running water, nothing to do.” Again, the irony…this sounds like the best way to spend time to me!

Mom continued, “I have fond memories of sitting around the campfire and everyone singing. I loved that, but there were many other bad memories associated with camping.”

One time they were camping around Williamsburg and her dad built a fire. He walked away and told my mom to watch the fire.

Mom said, “He built the fire over a hornets nest! I got stung so badly. It was horrible!”

Another time they left late and got to the lake after dark.

“Daddy was hellbent on launching the boat in the dark,” Mom said. “No lights at the marina. Pitch dark. I got out of the car and immediately stepped on a rusty nail an hour away from medical care. He was so mad.”

But somehow, I found my way back to the North Carolina mountains near where my Grandma used to camp, swim, and fish.

College is where I learned how to go backpacking, climbing, canoeing, and camping. I changed my major from English to Outdoor Education within the first semester. I fell in love with guiding people in the mountains.

Maybe liking camping skips a generation.

Me in college (2016) climbing off the Blue Ridge Parkway

1988

The government banned smoking on short commercial flights when Grandma was 58 years old.

Good thing Grandma had her own plane to do whatever she damn pleased.

In the same year, Grandma and Grandpa celebrated 40 years together as a married couple.

As I write this, I am only 29 years old and cannot imagine the lifetime they shared together.

1990

The first photograph of the whole solar system was taken when Grandma was 60 years old. 

1991

Grandma’s youngest daughter, my Aunt Kathryn, got married to Franz in 1991.

Kathryn is a great story teller and told us kids that when she met Franz, he was in a serious relationship with another woman.

Kathryn said something like, “But I stole him! I knew he was gonna be my man!”

And then she cracked us all up by showing us how to walk with a tasteful booty bounce.

1993

The World Wide Web was made available to the public for free use of the internet when Grandma was 63 years old.

1995

Grandma became a widow at 65 years old.

Grandpa died at 65 years old from a stroke two months after I was born. but he got to hold me as a little tiny two month old baby.

I grew up hearing very little about him. Two things were clear: he was an alcoholic and a funny man who liked to play pranks.

The famous advice I always heard about him was, “If you’re ever out to eat with him, and he orders peas, tell the waiter NO! Don’t bring the peas!”

And everyone would laugh.

“Why! What would he do?” I always asked, eager to hear the story again so I could laugh along with all my aunts and uncles.

Grandpa would embarrass the family by ordering a side of peas that he never ate. Instead, he put them on a spoon one by one and flung them across the dining room at people.

He mastered keeping a straight face when the peas hit a stranger in the head, so he never got caught. This is my favorite way to imagine the man I don’t remember meeting.

Grandma would go on to live for another 35 years without her husband Jack.



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3 comments

  1. Beth,I thoroughly enjoyed Part 3. Brought back lots of memories. I have never seen the last picture of Mama and Daddy. Love it. Keep writing!Love ya

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